Bee
WIP I based this off a comic I'm currently working on and there is blood/ in one of the paths so be warn. Blue font you interact with currently.
WIP I based this off a comic I'm currently working on and there is blood/ in one of the paths so be warn. Blue font you interact with currently.
Comments
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The idea of having two polar opposite ending is very interesting. One being innocent and pure, another violent and unexpected! Especially when the art style is so cute.
Although I understand the extreme contrast in ending were already decided when choosing the role in the beginning, I think it'd be more engaging if there were more choice and outcomes to each character. For example different ways of getting killed for the boy? xD
I really like what you've done - and the art is fun too! I think the art could use a little more finish to it - maybe bring it into digital and bump up the contrast?
This game is playable from beginning to end, and I enjoy the addition of the artwork! I feel the characters are interesting and the story and how it begins are engaging. I would say it may need more choices for players, so they can really feel immersed in the character they choose.
Story is super cute and fun. It's centered a lot around storytelling which is nice but I would have liked to have access to more choices. I like the artwork and it really suits the dreamy environment you created
I like the premise a lot, and there are some very cool scenes here. I think we need to tweak the artwork a bit. Remind me to show you how to crop images in Photoshop, and position them neatly on the pages when we meet. Keep it up!
Actually, nvm I saw you did it in later passages :)
It's an interesting game premise, but I found it hard to follow along as it's very wordy and there was also an error that blocked me from continuing my playthrough. Overall enjoyable.
where the issue?
"You show the bee a tiny self portrait and the sketches of the cave wall" It says
The (text-colour:) changer should be stored in a variable or attached to a hook.
It was fun but confusing at times.
I like the story; super interesting but would love to see it developed even further. A lot of the story wasn't as interactive as I would like so I'm eager to see that evolve.
I enjoy how thrilling the story is, it really helps to pull in the reader. I also enjoy the interesting dynamic being built between the characters. I agree with the other post on formatting/grammar, but also wanted to add to be careful about POV. At one point the story switches from using "You" to describe the player to "I", and that can become confusing. I would stay with "You" when it comes to this kind of game's formatting.
yeah I knew the grammar would have to be fixed.
I like the story - I would work on the spelling, grammar, and general formatting but obviously this is a draft. It would be nice if you had a chance to go back to the start at the end of a route so you can play both the paths.